Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Cute? FAKE! The Olympics take a sudden downturn

I still keep a diary (maybe that was why I found the diary entries in Vampire Diaries easy to write). And for maybe twenty years I’ve called it “A Very Minor Song” which is supposed to be a pun because of all the poetry—songlike stuff—inside it. But just now I found out that the Olympics’ very major song—the one where elfin Lin Miaoke sang “Ode to the Motherland”—was a fake. Actually, it was Yang Peiyi singing, an adorable little girl who just happens to have slightly crooked teeth.

There’s a lot a blah-blah out there about how Lin (fake) represented the Chinese heart and soul and Mom’s home made dimsum, but to me this is simply an outrage. What she represented was Cute. Yang (Real Star) must have represented all of the other good stuff in order to be able to sing what people all over the world are calling one of the most mesmerizing moments of the opening ceremony, yes? And yet Yang (Real Star) didn’t even get a moment on stage. Which is more fun? Lip-synching in front of the world or singing somewhere where no one can see you or acknowledge you (maybe in one of the boxes used to spell out HARMONY.)

One girl with an extraordinary voice is denied her chance in the (midnight) sun . . . because she’s not cute enough. I didn’t see anyone worry whether many of the male big honchos were or weren’t cute enough. Hey, maybe we should replace Bush with Obama right now. There’s something to be said on both sides of the debates in our bipartisan country, but I think most people would agree that Obama was cuter. Yeah, let’s do it, now! Only Cute people may apply for jobs of any kind. People with crooked teeth may do the actually work, but the Cute ones get paid. An idea like this could revolutionize a nation.

I could spend another hour working on this, making it Cuter, but I’m not going to. I’m giving the honest-to-goodness first draft because to hell with Cute, and that’s my opinion.